**On Monday, August 14, 2023, at the funeral for my +dad at St. Joseph Monastery Church, Irvington, Baltimore City, Maryland, this Eulogy was beautifully delivered by my niece, Hannah Schaeffer.
Today my family and I welcome you to Saint Joseph’s Monastery Church! In this special place our grandfather, +Eugene Anthony Dore, was baptized. He went here for elementary school, made his first communion, served as an Altar Boy, was a member of Boy Scout Troop 180, and received the Sacrament of Confirmation. Growing-up at 157 Collins Avenue, just a couple of blocks from here, he and his sister and brothers, Tom, Joe, and Mary Ann, were very involved in many social and spiritual activities of the parish. Here as a child our grandfather developed great admiration and respect for the Passionists priests and brothers, and the School Sisters of Notre Dame, who had very renowned and long histories administering the parish church and school communities.
Under the careful guidance and protection of his mother, our legendary Great-grandmother, +Frances Eckholm Dore, he was raised with a strong Catholic faith, a sense of commitment to his family, love for his country, and a very strong work ethic! He always spoke with great affection about the days of his childhood in this part of Baltimore City known as Irvington!
After his marriage to our South Baltimore born and raised grandmother, +Carolyn Winterling Dore, they for many years remained in this western part of the city, and as members of “the Monastery” parish, baptized, nurtured, and raised their six children: Michael, Timothy, Nancy, Kelly, Tracy, and Patricia. As a young family, they were very active in the life of the parish. Today, with sadness but with hope in eternal life, our family returns to this sacred place to celebrate the life of our grandfather.
To many who knew and loved him, our grandfather was known as “Gene,” to my mom and my aunts and uncles, as “dad,” but to me, my brothers and my sister, my cousins, and my children as “Grandpop” and “Pop Pop.”
My cousins, and my aunts and uncle, want to share some of our special memories and thoughts about this great man whom we loved very much!
Our grandfather was a man who loved his family. He was proud of all of his children: Michael and his wife Pat, Timothy and his Franciscan community, Nancy and her late husband, my dad +Doug (who only recently passed away), Kelly and her husband Toby, Tracy and her husband Richie, and Patricia and her husband Michael. He certainly had a very special place in his heart for all of his grandchildren. There are fifteen of us: myself Hannah, Christian, Caroline, Ben, Luke, Carina, Jack, Patrick, Audrey, Matthew, Katie, Abby, Madison, Riley and Piper. And he had two great grandchildren too: my own children Zoe and Leo!
The words “protector” and “care-giver” come to our minds when we think of him. He always asked us how we were doing with whatever was happening in our lives. When talking on the phone with him, or when visiting the beach house in Ocean City he always peppered us with questions about what we were up-to, about how our studies were progressing in school, about the jobs we took, and about the travels we had been making. Questions he asked were “how are you doing,” and “what are they teaching you in school,” and sometimes he would quiz us about how we felt about this or that political topic of the day. My cousin Luke spoke of the many conversations he had with our Grandfather. He said: “one of my favorite things about Pop Pop was his logic and pragmatism. An example that comes to mind is how silly he found it to watch sports highlights on the television. He used to crack up at the concept of watching a game, knowing the outcome, and then waking up and watching clips of the same game. We would laugh and go-back-and-forth about such things until he inevitably encouraged me to spend less time staring at the television, something he tongue-and-cheek labeled the ‘idiot box’,” Our grandfather was always willing to debate current issues with us! And he certainly let us know what his thoughts were about whatever topic was on the table for discussion. But honestly, sometimes it was best to stay away from debates about politics and religion, because he sure did have some very strong opinions on those topics! And we all knew it!
Our Grandpop wanted us to know we were loved and cherished. He also prayed that we would always be safe and secure in this sometimes complicated world, and he had lots of guidance to give us about how to accomplish that! Sometimes he would roll up his sleeves and show us how to fix or deal with the problems that arose in our lives. About this my mom Nancy commented “My dad did ‘the dad things’ things for me his entire life. He always wanted to protect me from harm. He did the same for my children and all of his kids and grand kids. And isn’t that what terrific fathers and grandfathers always do?” About this my cousin Matthew said “when I think of the times I shared with Pop Pop throughout my life, especially the countless times we stayed at his beach house, it always centered around spending time and connecting with family.” My cousin Luke said: “Pop Pop never made me feel like he was anything but immensely proud of me and that was something that really stuck with me. He had a pure heart and only wanted to see his family happy.” In a similar vein, my cousin Carina said: “one of the many ways he showed he cared for me and others was his attention and curiosity. A ten minute conversation to share news about a new job, or recent adventures overseas, would turn into over an hour long intellectual discussion. Pop Pop was curious about the cuisine, culture, and people, of the places I’ve been, especially when I moved to the country of Georgia, and he was also interested in the history and geopolitical issues that face the region.” Our grandfather took this kind of interest in all of the lives and adventures of each of his grandchildren! In this sense, he was a strong beacon of love and concern for all of us. About this, my cousin Luke said: “he made me feel that he was immensely proud of me and that was something that really stuck with me. He had a pure heart and only wanted to see his family happy.” And this is how his own children thought of him as well. My Aunt Tracy put it very simply when she said: “there are some who bring a light so great to the world that even after they have gone the light remains. To me, this was and is my dad; this is Gene Dore!”
My brothers, sister and cousins and I always believed our Grand Pop took great interest in what was going on in our lives, and he always greeted us with great love and affection, and he told us that he always thought about us and kept us in his prayers. About this, my Aunt Kelly said “I loved the way he would say hello to us at the beginning of the day with “Top ‘o the morning to ya! And at the end of the day, or when saying goodbye he would say Be Good, Be Well!” Aunt Kelly also recalled “the wonderful conversations and the sometimes not so wonderful conversations we had.” And she loved the way he was always interested in how her kids were doing and what was happening in their lives. My cousin Abby recalls sitting on the beach house porch with Grandpop and how gratifying it was to sit and talk and to do something simple together– like spending time eating cherries and passing the time joyfully. Abby also remembers fondly how Grandpop would attend her softball games and he would always playfully laugh and very affectionately call her a “jock.” My cousin Madison recalled how much she loved sitting at the kitchen table with him at the beach house and the many interesting conversations that happened there. She said: “I will be forever fond of my memories with Pop Pop sitting around that table!” My brother Christian recalled, “when I moved away and we spoke mostly on the phone, Grandpa would also tell me that he would pray for me, my father, my mother, or anyone that really needed it. And I always appreciated that and felt those prayers.” For all of us, it was so wonderful to have such a caring and loving grandfather who always remembered us with that type of love and affection.
Grandpop did love to have deep conversations with us, but he often would banter about with a great sense of humor and he loved to have fun times too! My cousin Piper recalled an event in her life that always makes her laugh at the memory; she and my cousin Katie were still very small and he took them to the beach and walked into the water holding their hands, but when a big wave came he let them go and ran away while they were knocked around in the shallow waters; then immediately coming to their rescue, he soon had both of them laughing about the whole thing! They’ve both loved playing in the waves ever since! Noting Grandpop’s constant sense of humor and fun, my cousin Piper recalled how even in his last days he never lost his sense of joy. She told of one day near the end of his life, when “he was surrounded by family who were feeling sad and saying their goodbyes, and yet he continued having as much fun in those moments as he could.” She remembered, “those days he still joked with us and even once pretended to fall into his bowl of soup as we fed him, coming up in a fit of laugher for giving us a little scare.” About this side of our grandfather, my cousin Patrick said: “I loved that Pop Pop could always make me smile and laugh. From bantering about our Calvert Hall/Loyola high school rivalry to telling me his stories, he always had a special way of making me happy. He showed me how important it was to have fun with the little things in life!” Patrick’s brother, my cousin Jack said: “Pop Pop was truly a great man. Between his witty jokes and captivating stories, there was never a dull moment with him. I’ll always cherish the time I was able to spend with him. We all loved him so much!”
And then there was our grandfather’s love of food, holiday celebrations, and family time. This was very true when our dear late grandmother +Carolyn was still healthy and at home. Their homes, in South Baltimore, and later in Ocean City, were always places for a good meal and wonderful family celebrations, especially during many holidays of the year when their homes were decorated for special occasions. My cousin Matthew shared how much he loved the festivities of Thanksgiving and Christmas time with his grandparents. He recalled how one Thanksgiving, when he was only five years old, he was given a Hallmark Christmas ornament, something that at the time was a bit of a custom in our extended family. Matthew’s ornament that year was a choo choo train, and he recalls how much excitement Grandpop shared with him as Matthew opened the gift and showed it to him. It’s a joyful memory that stays with him until this day! Grandpop continued many of these holiday traditions even during these last years after Grandmom passed-away and he would revel in family visits to the Ocean City beach house. And Granpop loved to cook on his grill, to order out food from different restaurants, to try new types of cuisine, and to do so with fun and a sense of excitement. My cousin Katie tells a story about how when once at his house, and since only the two of them were there that evening, she told him she wanted to fix liver and onions, something she had never had nor tasted. About that experience, she recalled “And so, Pop Pop took me to the grocery store and we each picked out our own liver. We got back to the house and we prepared the meal together and set the table just for us. I took one bite and spit it right out. He thought it was so funny that he laughed hysterically. We then tossed the liver and onions and then grilled big T-bone steaks on the grill that night. And we had a wonderful meal and time together!” My cousin Audrey recalled, “At least one morning during every visit to the beach, Pop Pop and I would spend time together in the kitchen making bacon for breakfast. And during those times, Pop Pop taught me how to cook the bacon on a griddle. Since then, I now insist that only a griddle should be used to cook bacon. And although it was the bacon that brought us together on those many morning, it was really the time I was able to spend with him in the kitchen I am truly grateful for.” My sister Caroline recalls a similar cooking memory from just last summer when Grandpa asked her to teach him how to make a pie. They worked together in the kitchen and had a wonderful time together putting together all the ingredients and cooking the pie. She said: “I was a little surprised that he wanted to learn how to make a pie, but then again he was always curious and interested to learn new things.” Something she also recalled about that time together was how much he loved talking to her about her life, her job, and what she thought about things going on in the world these days. And about all the conversations they had that afternoon, Caroline said “It was a lovely quiet afternoon together.”
And everyone remembers our grandfather’s sense of adventure. My brother Christian and I remember so well one time when we went out on Grandpa’s skiff boat together and we caught about a hundred clams. We went around for a while with no luck, but then eventually found a hot spot caught all those clams! We probably would have gotten more if our feet didn’t get cut up from “finding the clams” with our feet. We brought them back to the beach house, grandma steamed them and we had a big clam feast. I remember thinking Grandpop knew everything about everything— this was such a random adventure, but he knew exactly what to do. He loved taking us on those little adventures at the beach! My Aunt Trish tells of a story that happened with that same skiff boat many years earlier. She shares about a time on one particular beautiful day, when she was still very young that our grandfather took her and their beloved family dog Pepper, and they launched the boat out of Curtis Bay and headed to Fort Carroll in the middle of the harbor. Upon their arrival, they quickly decided to explore the prohibited closed fort, and so they tied the boat off, climbed up the battered pier, and then explored the fort with Pepper in tow. She recalls how much they all enjoyed every bit of their trespassing adventure. They then ran into a little bit of Karma when, returning to Curtis Bay, they had some trouble getting the small boat back onto its trailer in the boat slip, and it started to drift out into the harbor away from them. Said Aunt Trish, “my dad and I looked like the city slickers we were-all the while laughing and enjoying the hilarity of the day. We often looked fondly back on that day when talking about his little boat.” My Uncle Timmy shared about how much he loved spending time with his our grandfather. Said he, “my dad was always up for an adventure. When we were children, he and my mom took us on family trips to Ocean City, the lake at Greenbrier State Park, to camping trips in Western Maryland, to the Eastern Shore and to Assateage Island, or to visit cousins in Vermont, to upstate New York and to so many other places, and as kids we always had so much fun and excitement on all of those trips and adventures. In their later years, my folks went on trips to Ireland, on cruised to the Caribbean, and on trips to Germany, and to Sweden. And even recently I traveled with my dad on ‘road trips’ to Maine to visit my sister Kelly and her family, and to Florida too.” What wonderful memories with such a great man we were all proud to call dad, Grandpa, Granpop, Pop Pop and even affectionately as Geno!
In his last days, our grandfather often spoke of how much he missed our grandmother, his beloved wife Carolyn, who passed-away five years ago after a long illness. He often told us how much he looked forward to “seeing her again.” My brother Ben summed it up beautifully when he wrote to us for this eulogy; he said “but when I look back and think about it, one of the sweetest memories I have of Grandpop is a simple testament to the devotion and love he had for my grandmother. Not long after she passed, my grandfather told me the story of how when he was very young he met his future wife. And after he finished he said simply, almost to himself, ‘she was the love of my life.’ And then he sat quietly for many moments, smiling at the memories that passed with them.”
We have lost a great man, but heaven has gained another Angel.
Rest in peace Grandpa, and may you find everlasting happiness in the presence of God, and arm in arm with our dearly missed Grandma!
We love you!
1 comment:
Kathie Richardson ..Just beautiful! No words….❤️❤️
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