Santina P. Cricchio (July 9, 1929-July 4, 2015)
(Funeral: 10:30 a.m., Thursday, July 9, 2015 at St. Leo Church, 227 S Exeter Street, Baltimore, Maryland)
I
would be fibbing if I told you I wasn’t a bit nervous to be standing
here before you to preach for the funeral Mass of this very beautiful
woman who was like a mother to so many! I’m actually honored and
humbled at the same time to have this opportunity to share some thoughts
with all of you.
How wonderful it is to see so many people here, so many who have been “
mothered”
by Santina over the years. I know that Santina’s family is very
consoled by the presence of so many priests and friars, family members,
friends, and even the large group of parishioners who traveled from
Most Holy Trinity–St. Mary in Brooklyn to be here today.
As I was thinking about what I wanted to say in this homily, I realized that Santo (
also known as Sam and Sammy) and I have known each other since I was fourteen years old–from the time we were both students at that “
other” Catholic high school (
Calvert Hall)
here in Baltimore! As I thought about and prepared for this moment, I
came to the conclusion that I couldn’t stand here today and not
somehow talk about celebrations, parties and food! In fact, I find it
no coincidence that we are gathered here today on what is Santina’s
birthday–a day that would normally be an occasion of celebration and
promise.
Gathering at the table, and celebrating and
sharing food were always an important part of Santina’s life. Santo and
I lived together in Brooklyn for many years, and I always knew that
when Santina and her family came to visit that their stay would also
involve reservations at one or another great New York restaurant. I
knew those meals would also always involve a commitment of many hours of
time, as the meal experience and the family time together was to be
relished and savored.
My earliest memories of Santina
were from my visits to her family’s home on the Alameda. There was
always lots of love evident there, and Santina was no doubt the queen
of her kitchen in that house, and of course there was always plentiful
and delicious Italian food served at her table! Having this memory of
course made me think of my many visits to the family restaurant here in
Little Italy, Caesar’s Den, or “
the Den” as it was
affectionately called. I remember one of my visits there on a Sunday
evening, when the whole family was present and where, believe it or
not, I was actually “
affectionately chastised” by Santina.
My
brother and dear friend Santo relished the opportunity to share the
restaurant, and the life of his parents and his family with so many of
his friends and the friars, and I too on many occasions shared the
blessing of that experience in that home of theirs. In that place it
was obvious that their family members truly loved one another and were
people of great faith–in their home it could be said that their family
truly “
remained in God’s love” in the same manner so beautifully described in today’s second reading (
see 1 John 4:11-16).
On
one of those visits, Santina proudly stood at the table as she truly
fulfilled her role as matriarch of her family; Nino had one eye on the
family, and the other eye on some intense Italian soccer match playing
on the television, Tina went back and forth, from the table and our
friendly conversation to warmly greeting the restaurant patrons who came
to the door; Guido spent much of that evening back in the kitchen and
masterfully presided over the preparation of all the delicious food
that kept arriving on the table; Tony was there, and I remember that he
offered an impassioned discourse about some important political or
social issue, and Francesca, much younger than she is today, sat quietly
and lovingly doted on her grandmother.
Glasses full of
fine Italian wine were poured, and then the food started to arrive, and
it just kept coming, one dish after another! First there was the
antipasto, with delicious salads, salami, cheeses and those wonderful
olives; then came the arancini, the capunata and the fried calamari;
then a fantastic pasta course, and there was plenty of it; next to
arrive at the table were samples of saltimbocca and chicken parmesan.
After
really feeling that I had greatly indulged myself, I started to think
that I couldn’t possibly eat any more food, even though the choices
continued to be abundant and plentiful. I quietly whispered to Santo
that I thought I had reached my limit–and then I noticed a kind of
incredulous look on Santina’s face. She glanced at Santo, then she
took a look at my empty plate, and then darted a stare back to Santo
and finally looked me straight in the eye and sharply proclaimed and
asked at the same time: “
That’s not all your going to have, is it?”
I knew I had to save a little room for the promised tiramisu, gelato and expresso, so for a second, I feared Santina’s “
motherly wrath,”
but I quickly realized it was actually truly affectionate and loving.
She wanted me, and all of us, to enjoy that moment to the fullest!
She had a deep perspective on what it meant to share time with family
and friends, and with food and plenty, and that such would nurture not
only the body and the spirit, but the soul as well.
With this memory of Santina’s “
wrath” in mind, I very intentionally asked Santo if today I could use the Gospel about the “
Wedding Feast at Cana” (
see John 2:1-11).
So there they were, Mary and Jesus and some of his disciples, and they
had been invited to a family celebration, a wedding feast, a banquet, a
party, an event where there was lots of joyful celebration, and where
it could be expected that there would be lots of delicious food and
good wine. When it became apparent that they had run out of wine for
the banquet, Mary, the mother of Jesus essentially said to him “
do something about this!”
In a way, we might say that Mary’s words at Cana were something like
Santina’s words to me that I just mentioned. Mary essentially said to
Jesus: “
That’s not all we’re going to have, is it?”
The
miracle of the turning of water into wine at Cana was the first of
many miracles that were meant to reveal to the people who Jesus truly
was. At Cana, after Jesus performed the miracle and suddenly the
banquet was replenished with the best of wine, the Gospel tells us that
“
the headwaiter called the bridegroom and said to him, ‘Everyone
serves good wine first, and then when people have drunk freely, an
inferior one; but you have kept the good wine until now’” (
see John 2:9b-10).
This miracle is said to be a metaphor for whom Jesus himself was. He himself was “
the better part”
and the fulfillment of all that had come before him as preached by the
prophets and lawgivers of the Old Testament. When Mary essentially
asked “
that’s not all we’re going to have, is it?” the answer was clearly an emphatic “
no, the best is yet to come.”
There
were much greater things to be had in the person of Jesus who as it
turned out was the promised Messiah and the one who would be the Savior
of the World! Jesus demonstrated this by giving the best of the wine
to the people after the lesser, inferior wine had previously been
served. In this sense, the lesser, inferior wine represented the old
ways which preceded the incarnation of Jesus and his saving presence
among all men and women. Jesus himself was “
the good wine.”
Today,
as we bring Santina to this church of St. Leo, we gather around this
altar, this table where we will receive the true food from heaven, the
bread of life and our salvation. Over very many years, and many times,
Santina and her family came to celebrate their faith in this very
building, and at this same altar. With her in mind, and celebrating her
life, we come here again today.
During her life, Santina relished sharing food at the table in her home and in the restaurant. She delighted in being “
mother”
to all of us in the way that she nourished and brought us joy. She
was also a person of great faith who no doubt knew that a greater
feast, a heavenly banquet, would be awaiting us all someday. And now
we are confident that she is at that table in heaven, and gathered
there are her husband Nino, her parents Santo and Maria Presti, her
in-laws Salvatore and Maria Cricchio and so many other friends and
family members who have gone before us.
If we listen closely, Santina says to each one of us today, as we remain here in this life: “
That’s not all your going to have, is it?”
Today, as we affirm our belief that Santina now sits at that heavenly
table, we also remember that today marks the day of her birth into this
life. And although we will not celebrate today with a cake and
candles, what we will celebrate in this church and at this altar today,
is our shared opportunity to enjoy the “
the good wine, the better part.” Through this sacred meal we can be confident that “
the best is yet to come”
and that someday we too will forever enjoy the fullness of this
promise with Santina and all of the angels and saints in heaven.
We
celebrate today the promise of life eternal where there is no more
suffering, no more sickness, no more pain and sorrow, but only happiness
and joy forever with our God. With Santina someday, we will again sit
at the table with her, and forever we will enjoy the food of the
heavenly banquet, the feast of heaven.
Tina and Guido,
Santo, Tony, Francesca and David, we are all with you in our love, our
thoughts and our prayers today. Thank you so much for lovingly sharing
your beautiful mother and grandmother with us. We are all eternally
grateful, and we look forward to the day when all of us will once again
be sitting at the same table, where we will all celebrate with great
love and joy! Amen.
Praise God! Friar Timothy
Find me on Facebook by clicking on the following link: http://www.facebook.com/frayteo
